We've all been there. You know, that time when you are just mad, upset, sad, or guilty and just can't let that feeling go. We sometimes can hold onto it for days, weeks or a lifetime. But let me ask you this, how does that serve you? Does holding on to that feeling make you better? Does it hold your best interest? Most likely the answer is no.
Emotions are a tricky thing. We all have them. That's what makes us human - the ability to feel something on a complex emotional level. Feelings and emotions have a great purpose, and they help direct us in our lives according to our own moral compass. But, they are NOT meant for us to hold. Or as someone once told me, "They are not your blankie! Don't hold on to them like they are something you hold on to for safety!". And that's very true! We don't need to carry those feelings with us. They are meant to be momentary so we can correct our flight pattern in life. But beyond that, they need to be dropped so that we can view life from a clear lens.
A close friend (shoutout to Scott Garwood) recently taught me to do this as I was holding on to guilt in my life that resulted from me trying to take responsibility for things that were out of my control. I was trying to blame and punish myself for what happened by holding on to my guilt. But what I realized was that this was actually holding me down, preventing me from moving forward and achieving my goals. So he showed me how to make these negative feelings powerless in my life, and since then, I feel 1,000 times lighter. So now, I want to show you how to do the same thing.
HOW TO LET GO OF FEELINGS THAT ARE NO LONGER SERVING YOU:
1) Allow yourself to feel the feeling you wish to let go of.
2) Once that feeling comes up, resist the urge to label it (guilt, anger, sadness etc). It is just a feeling. Nothing else. Once you label a feeling, you attach to it more (kind of like when you name a dog! See what I mean?)
3) Now, focus all of your attention on where you feel that feeling in your body and what it feels like. For example, I feel a lot of my feelings in my throat and chest and it often feels like a tightening feeling.
4) Any time your mind starts to focus on the events or situation behind the feeling (i.e. why you are feeling that feeling) bring your attention back to the feeling itself in your body. Don't think about the feeling, just focus on feeling it.
5) As you are feeling that sensation in your body, breathe. You will notice, the feeling will start to just melt away. Keep breathing and focusing on the feeling in your body until it has completely left your body.
That's it! It's that simple. We often try to rationalize what we are feeling, thinking to ourselves, "Why am I feeling this way? Is is because of X or Y?" By doing this, you are giving that emotion more validity and allowing it to stay with you! So I urge you guys to practice this the next time you notice you are holding onto something that is not serving you.
Give it a try and let me know what you think! Feel free to comment your experience on this post.
With Light and Love,